When You’re Feeling LOST, Remember Why You Started & Surround Yourself with Good People
“We’re lost again”, said Big Panda.
“When I’m lost”, said Tiny Dragon, “I find it helps to go back to the beginning and try to remember why I started.”
This picture is from one of the loveliest, most poignant books I’ve ever read and one of the most meaningful gifts I’ve ever received: Big Panda and Tiny Dragon, written & illustrated by James Norbury.
Inspired by Buddhist philosophy, it takes you on a thought-provoking journey through the seasons with these two loveable friends, as they navigate life with the multitude of obstacles that arise.
This post is a little bit about my recent journey of discovery, my hopeful road to happiness and a few lovely lessons learned along the way…
Up until about a year ago, I was almost completely offline for over 3 years for multiple reasons, having given up on using social media to record & share my journey, going dark in the overwhelmingly bright & shiny online world.
I had already stopped writing my original blog a few years before that – when various relocations & navigating a new hometown, a full time job and the mayhem of everyday family life simply got in the way!
However, since moving back to Europe, struggling through the various Covid lockdowns (with all of the homeschooling and other joys & challenges that those brought), then suffering through and surviving burnout & depression, the itch has always been at the back of my mind to start over (again), start writing (again) and start creating (again).
I’d been contemplating relaunching my LOVELYness blog and rejoining the IG community for a while, but I didn’t quite know where to begin. Reading this quote helped me a lot and gave me the inspiration I needed…
“We’re lost again”, said Big Panda.
“When I’m lost”, said Tiny Dragon, “I find it helps to go back to the beginning and try to remember why I started.”
It reminded me why I started it all in the first place, which was:
- To celebrate the small daily joys that fill my life with meaning.
- To write about things that really matter to me.
- To process my thoughts, record my lessons and preserve my stories through writing about them.
- To share the mini-milestones with our family & friends, helping us to stay in touch across the many miles that divide us.
- To create something, build something, have something I can say I’ve actually achieved.
- To provide a little bit of inspiration to others that may be in a similar position or life stage.
- To spread a little LOVELYness out into the world.
I realised that what I had been doing back then was actually extremely beneficial to my mental health and so it was a great reason to turn back to it. By actively seeking out, capturing or recording the sometimes seemingly insignificant moments of daily life, I was filled with gratitude for what I’d been given, regardless of the struggles we’d encountered along the way…
This habit helped keep me grounded & present in the moment, rather than grieving for the past or worrying about the future. Then, at times when I was feeling low, scrolling back through the pictures or reading through old posts would always make me smile 🙂
I’ve since learned that by being offline & shutting myself off, I completely lost my creative outlet & source of personal fulfilment.
Furthermore, I also shut out & sadly lost touch with a few of my oldest friends and some of the loveliest people I’ve had the privilege of meeting along the way. Lesson learned and it’s something I’m hoping to change moving forwards!
And who knows what other lovely people I’ll find along the way…
“Which is more important,” asked Big Panda, “the journey or the destination?”
“The company”, said Tiny Dragon.
Those very few people that are closest to me will know that I desperately struggled through the past 2 years or so… What started out as months of positional vertigo (where I could barely get up, let alone leave the house) brought on by stress & anxiety, resulted in burnout, depression & extreme fatigue that it took me almost a year to recover from.
It was a long & painful journey (one day, one step at a time) where I had to shut myself off from almost everyone except for our little family, just to have the strength to get through the day… It is still something I work at on a daily basis, following healthy habits to preserve my mental health and retain my inner happiness.
The destination is still uncertain, which is absolutely fine for now – I’m all about the simple Pursuit of LOVELYness, wherever that may lead me…
However, as Tiny Dragon says in the picture above, it is the company that’s more important than the journey or the destination, so I’m extremely & eternally grateful to have had the best & most loving, supportive husband by my side through the whole ordeal! He, along with our two beautiful daughters and a small handful of people helped save me and bring me back to life.
Looking back through photos from the last few years, I realised that even through everything I was going through, I never actually lost my joy for photography, never stopped seeking out the small joys…
Looking for moments of LOVELYness to anchor me along the way reminded me why life actually was truly worth living! At times I couldn’t feel any happiness about the events as they were happening, but I recorded them anyway and was grateful for the company of my family on my journey. I had hope/faith that I’d eventually get better!
When I truly did start to feel joy again, I actually cried happy tears that my dormant feelings had been revived. That’s a memory I’ll never forget…
Now, looking back, I’m so glad that I did keep a record of a few valuable moments, because the desired effect & elusive emotions have returned.
It’s taken me quite a while longer than planned to get to this point, but I’m finally posting & sharing again (as much for my own benefit as anyone else’s), celebrating my small everyday moments of joy & sharing fond memories, whilst also working on various articles for this new blog.
One of the most difficult but helpful & valuable things I did on my road to recovery was a 6-week rehab day clinic programme for burnout & depression. At first I was ashamed to even mention it to anyone, but since it was such an integral & beneficial part of helping me heal and has also inspired the new direction of my blog, I’m now happy to openly talk about it…
It was extremely helpful in getting me back on the right track in life and served to open my eyes a bit more to the importance of mental health, emotional wellbeing & self-care.
Realising all of this was when I decided that these meaningful topics were things I was a lot more interested in writing about than baking tips, crafting projects & places to visit (as I’d previously had on my blog). Another lovely lesson learned!
A very dear friend, who never gave up on me during my darkest months, gifted me this Big Panda and Tiny Dragon book that I’ve referenced here on the day I completed the rehab programme. It is one of the loveliest presents I’ve ever received and moved me to tears. I cannot recommend it highly enough as the perfect gift for anyone needing a little wisdom or gentle motivation.
Thank you to her & to Mr Fix It, for walking with me through the shadows while I was lost & for helping me to find my light again.
With Love & LOVELYness,
Holly x